Instead of saying that I am reluctant to let go,a better version to describe it is I just don't want to give up.I clearly remember unto this day the agony and the loss that I felt.I tried to persist even though I knew in my heart that it was an impossible case.I was struggling not to let go.What a idiot I was at that time!
问题补充：
I think it was owing to the sadness and feeling of helplessness that prompted me to make this decision.