went on a visit不好,应是paid a visit(你把全文的visit都拼错了!).
the first不能加the.
at wonder也不对,wonder前加the.
than改then.
we liked it very much前加that更好.
palace of history你是想表示故宫吧?用the Palace Museum.
结尾改为What a good(wonderful) trip (it was!)
帮我检查仪下我的小作文语法上有没有错误的地方.看看有无错误单词和不够好的地方.