Yao Ming is great basketball star------在is后加a
He play basketball is very well----------He playS basketball very well 这句话谓语动词有两个,一个是is一个是play,显然错了,记住单三后动词加s
At six thirty he run with his friends-----he runS---记住单三后动词加s
After run------------------------------------After running,AFTER后用动名词
Then he listen to music at eight thirty---he listens to music
Nine o'clock,he play basketball--------At nine o'clock,he playS basketball
At twelve o'clock eats lunch------------At twelve o'clock he eats lunch
We very like Yao Ming!-----------------We like Yao Ming very much!
错误太多,句式也比较单一,六点半之类的时间表达可采用half past of ,to ,past 等
参考一下