1.I must to give voice to my love-------I must give a voice to my love(must后接动词原形)
2.I prepared to do it a the Queen Cafe.——地点前少介词,用in the Queen Cafe
3.I am full of confidence in my own ._--------by one's own
4.I sat in the cafe began my waiting,waited for my love arrived and considered how to express my feeling.---------建议删began my waiting,
for my love arrived改成for my love's arriving因为她
还没来.
5.Slowly in the past－－－建议改成time flied slowly
6.My heart beanten fast as fast as machine gun shoot.－－－－建议换种表达,这种比喻不太温馨,My heart beanten faster and faster.
7.liked a pure angel.－－－like此为介词,不是动词,直接用